Tuesday, February 01, 2011

Letters: what's so terrible?

Dear Captain,


I don't know what we're going to do with you.  My mother has decided you're foraying into the terrible twos. Somehow you manage to simultaneously be so terrible and so sweet.

I have never seen a body so inclined to giving spontaneous kisses and "thank you"s.

Nor have I ever seen a body so incapable of seeing a button and not pushing it.

Hence the fire you nearly started in the kitchen yesterday.  You and that "Add 1 minute" button must have become best buddies for a while.  Can I take the funds for replacing the microwave out of your future allowance?  And how many times have you started an empty dishwasher?

There is only one of me, boy.  I cannot be looking over your shoulder always.  I can't but I should, somehow, because most of the stuff you seem bent on destroying is not ours and is not cheap.

So why is it that you can give me a kiss and a sweet little look and suddenly everything is ok?  You are such a turkey.

How can you be so disobedient and yet such an obedient child?  When we're watching you, you'll do everything we ask with a smile.  You even clean up toys unprovoked (is it the OCD in you?).  But as soon as we get distracted by a brother or a shower or a household chore - you dart off and start pushing buttons again.  Is there a name for this uncontrollable inclination?




E n D said...

He sounds JUST like Cole! They must be the same age :) Today while Cole was "helping" me make dinner he dumped a whole jar of garlic powder and milk from his sippy cup into the waffle maker. Anything that didn't make it into the waffle maker immediately got smeared all over the counter and floor. Then he said "Mess" and wanted me to clean his hands. The crazy thing is I was standing right next to him cooking chicken, but it all happened so fast I couldn't stop him. Gotta love it!
It was so fun to see you guys the other day! I hope it happens again!

--jeff * said...

again, i hope that somewhere you are archiving this (as a hard copy!) for the day when the internet becomes obsolete or in any other scenario that would prevent these postings from being looking on by the captain and subsequent generations of offsprings.

posts like this are why i read this blog.

hairyshoefairy said...

Oh, dear. Button pushing, huh? I wonder if that's in my future with my little guy. Yikes! Good thing the Captain is so darn cute.

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