Monday, February 27, 2006

Signs I should have stayed in bed on Sunday...

1.) - Orange juice tastes about the same coming back up as it did going down.

2.) - Round Ligament pain leaves me feeling like I was in a car wreck the day before.

3.) - Uber-early church meetings leave me with no time to recover from item #1

4.) - I take a coma-like nap on Mr. Renn's shoulder through Sacrament Meeting and drool all over him.

5.) - My team-teacher for my unwieldy primary class (of 14-9 year olds) has a sinus infection and is more or less high on medication.

6.) - Said primary class takes it upon themselves to be high-maintenance.

7.) - Blood sugar level is so low by the time I begin teaching primary lesson that I am seeing stars.

8.) - I am interrupted no less than 9 times with requests to go to the bathroom.

9.) - I tell my class (in exasperated ornery voice) that unless they need to puke, they cannot go to the bathroom in the middle of class or sharing time, and that I am the only on likely to puke at the moment.

10.) - Primary President's youngest child with rampant case of youngest-child-need-to-be-constantly-coddled-ness refuses to participate in class and curls up underneath his chair.

11.) - In an attempt to fix #10, I ask said child to pass out paper to everyone in the class, specifically requesting he be quick and reverent.

12.) - #11 totally backfires, as said child develops unanticipated sexism and refuses to distribute paper to the girls in the room he doesn't like.

13.) - One of the girls mentioned in #12 slugs said Youngest-child-syndrome-problem child.

14.) - Youngest-child-syndrome-problem child starts sobbing uncontrollably. I decide my team-teacher can handle it and proceed with my lesson. If I'd been paying any attention whatsover, I'd have realized my team teacher was way too occupied fighting with another child who refused to open scriptures and liked to make spitwads.

15.) - I mention something about drawing a picture of Abraham and the whole class rushes forward in a race to get pencils and crayons. I over-react and yell in a less-than-friendly-voice.

16.) - My primary class makes such a mess of their classroom that I insist they clean up after themselves. By the time they are done the next class has been waiting in the hall for 10 minutes and they have started sharing-time without us.

17.) - Youngest-child-syndrome-problem child is still sobbing, and it turns out he was supposed to give a talk in sharing time. He refuses and his parents (who were both there to hear his talk) take him out in the hall and coddle him until he stops crying, then they glare at me for not doing the same.

18.) - I find out I missed a "mandatory" inservice meeting the day before and Primary President, with glare mentioned in #17, gives me large packet of information from said meeting. The page on top reads "How to teach and encourage good behavior in your class..." or something like that.

19.) - By the end of sharing-time I am prepared to ask to be released from my calling, but hope that a good nap will calm me down.

20.) - I wait in the foyer for an unexpected 15+ minutes for Mr. Renn to get out of his meetings. He is all chipper as he starts telling me about the great lessons he had in Sunday School and Priesthood. I very nearly slug him.

21.) - Mr. Renn convinces me to attend a choir practice after my nearly-successful nap. Primary President is there and somehow manages to simultaneously glare at me while also patting my pregnant belly without asking me first. I very nearly slug her too.

Yup, I definitely should have stayed in bed.

1 comment:

hairyshoefairy said...

Grr. I would have growled at the mean PP. You're so good to still be teaching and attending church feeling the way you do. I don't often miss church, but with early morning church, if I threw up that morning, it was just not happening. Why kill myself to get there only to spend the entire time thinking how much I need to eat or focusing on trying not to puke on the person sitting next to me? I do take snacks now and attend regularly, but I'm also not puking all that often anymore. You're a strong woman!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...