I do not have a hang of this yet.
There are some super sweet moments, total tender mercies.
(Samantha rocks)
But most moments are not like that.
Today within 2 minutes the Captain hit our baby Gentleman on the head with a plastic dog, Sir O hit the Captain with a toy xylophone, and Sir O managed to perch so precariously on my computer chair (while watching Blues Clues via Netflix) that he fell and hurt himself.
There was a lot of crying in 2 minutes. And a lot of yelling. By me.
I'm off the lortab and only taking ibuprophen for pain now. Mostly because I am a weakling and have a low pain threshold. I like being able to think more clearly, but am frustrated because I'm still not thinking clearly enough to keep ahead of the game of 3 sons. That is only going to come with sleep and exercise. I can have neither right now.
Luckily I have got initiative and motivation. Those are certainly not a given at this point, so I'm appreciating them. I'm celebrating the things I can do. I can bend over to pick things up. I can see my toes, I even painted them yesterday. Since I still have help most of the time I can get small tasks done during some of our Gentleman's longer naps - I've stayed on top of laundry and ironing and writing thank-you notes.
Most importantly, food tastes like food again. There is nothing like eating when things taste just right.
Our Gentleman is a massive cluster feeder. He'll go for 3 hours or so and want to feed almost constantly, then take a 3 or 4 hour nap. The trick is to try to time the long naps to be at night when I can sleep..... and minimize the forever long feeding frenzies at night when I could otherwise be sleeping. I've had one night so far where the stars aligned just right and I got two four hour bursts of sleep almost back to back. Other nights.... not so much.
I still get crazy giddy inside looking at this tiny bundle and trying to wrap my brain around his potential. His personality and a whole life of choices are still an unknown, and while part of that terrifies me, it's also exciting to know I'm the steward of him and his life, at least for a while. There are moments (like that wild 2 minutes) that I question God's wisdom in entrusting these boys to my care, but mostly I trust that whom the Lord calls, He qualifies.
And I trust that my kids will develop amnesia as needed, and hopefully not be too scarred by my screw-ups and shortcomings.
What else can I do?
11 comments:
My sister's stress levels spiked with the birth of her third child. She only got the hang of it when the oldest started school (she had wanted to homeschool before the third was born). Of course, her middle child also turned out to be highly functioning autistic. Her kids are now 6, 4, and 2, and she has dared to attempt a fourth, due May 12.
something about you taking the time to paint your toenails made me really happy. : )
it will work out, em.
(...says the single guy who has never had to spend more than a few hours alone with one child...)
still, it will work out.
changing the subject:
are any other long-time readers here wondering where the time has gone from the days that we were reading about the pre-natal days of sir o? dang....
Oh Em, these are the down to earth posts that I love. You are so frank. I can only imagine what it is like. But I do know that your strong faith and determination will be strengths, and pretty soon, it will be hard to imagine anything different than having your three sweet boys around.
PS - I feel like that "2 minute" moment is happening constantly at my house...
Aww love that sweet picture. Just keep looking at it when you think you are reaching the breaking point. Em you can do it and you will. Love you!!
Such a sweet photo. And I'm sure you'll get the hang of it all eventually. It takes time, I'm sure, but once you get it I'm willing to bet you'll be great.
Beautiful post, Emily. Motherhood is manic. All highs and all lows. You are handling it beautifully. Here's wishing you a few "in between days", some drama free moments. Hold on to your new little "Gentelman" He will no longer be a newborn in a few short weeks.
You did fine with 2 boys, I know you'll be fine with 3. They are all darling. You have the cutest babies! Three kids is a challenge, but you get used to it. My third pregnancy was the hardest, but my baby was the easiest out of the three. Still is. I hope you are doing well, and if you need anything, let me know! :)
Your new little one is just darling Em. I stumbled upon this blog soon after Sir O was born and have been reading ever since. The cinnamon rolls you linked to years back have changed my life, and our an annual request from my entire extended family (and friends) at Christmas time. You have three beautiful boys and you are so blessed to be back in Utah surrounded by loved ones to help when you need it. The key to thriving with more than two kids? Ask for help, don't worry about infringing on people who love you. All they can say is no. But most likely will say yes when they can. :) Keep your head up you are doing a great job!
Oh, I think you are such an amazing mother! Your little gentleman has no idea how many wonderful and creative moments you're going to be giving him in the coming years! And that picture of all three boys is absolutely precious looking! Hope you're feeling well and getting a little more sleep.
It's such a leap of faith to add another person (a very needy person at that) to the family. We grow and we stretch and then one day we are so capable that life seems normal. Still, it's a lot of work getting there. He is adorable. And the sleeping thing does get better faster than it seems like it will.
It goes by so fast!!! I can attest since Sam is almost 6 months old. I will admit that the first 3 months are a bit of a foggy, sleep deprived blur, but those sweet baby snuggle times are the best! Enjoy it!
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